Cultivating Trust

Raymond Martinez, pencil drawing, “God’s Help, God’s Hope.” Inspired by Psalm 146:5-9. 

From InsideOut Art, an arts program for men incarcerated at California prisons.

Worry is like weeds.  I’ve been learning about weeds lately; let me tell you how that happened.  My next-door neighbor Tomaz was the reason I had the courage to try planting a native garden.  He planted one first, and he knew how.  Then Tomaz moved.  My new neighbor Seema is keeping the native plants in her garden.  But she has joint issues that prevent her from weeding.  I glibly said I’d weed her front yard.  I had no idea what I was in for.  Why does it grow so many more weeds than my garden, when it is right next door?  It’s a mystery.  Part of the problem is that I don’t weed it as carefully or as often as my own garden. Give those weeds a head start, and they’ll outrun you.  Part of the problem is she’s got too much bare dirt, just waiting for weeds to sprout. Seema hires a gardener to come weed every month or two.  It’s not his garden either.  He doesn’t get all the weeds.  But he did pull up most of the California Poppies last time he came.  

We don’t cultivate weeds on purpose.  You don’t invite weeds into your garden.  They just come.  The seeds blow in on the wind of the nightly news and a culture that teaches us to fear and resent.  The more you put up with those weeds of worry, the more they take over.  The more you try to ignore them, work around them them, the bigger they get.  

Trust is the open soil that allows new things to grow in us.  Worry, like weeds, crowds out the possibility of new things.  Where do your weeds come from?  Were the seeds planted in childhood? Worry can be a mental health issue. Worry is also a spiritual issue, because how we understand the world and the sacred makes a big difference in how we deal with those weeds. Cultivating the garden of our mind, our soul, is a sacred task and privilege to which God invites us.  

Cultivating is usually slow and careful work.  It requires persistent attention, and repetition.  Despite frustrations, despite a modest result, cultivating trust is worth doing.  Last week I showed you a hula-hoe, a great tool for weeding our native garden.  What tools can we use to weed out worry and cultivate trust?

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Brea Congregational United Church of Christ

March 17, 2019

Cultivating Trust

Luke 12:22-32  He said to his disciples, “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat, or about your body, what you will wear.  23 For life is more than food, and the body more than clothing.  24 Consider the ravens: they neither sow nor reap, they have neither storehouse nor barn, and yet God feeds them. Of how much more value are you than the birds!  25 And can any of you by worrying add a single hour to your span of life?  26 If then you are not able to do so small a thing as that, why do you worry about the rest?  27 Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not clothed like one of these.  28 But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, how much more will he clothe you—you of little faith!  29 And do not keep striving for what you are to eat and what you are to drink, and do not keep worrying.  30  For it is the nations of the world that strive after all these things, and your Father knows that you need them.  31 Instead, strive for his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well. “Do not be afraid, little flock, for it is your Father’s good pleasure to give you the kingdom.

“Don’t worry,” says Jesus in today’s reading.  Easier said than done.  He was talking about the most basic things we can worry about, having food and clothing and shelter.  But we can worry and fret and second-guess ourselves over just about anything.  A healthy jolt of fear at the right time can protect us, cause us to take action.  But nagging ongoing worry steals our joy, saps our energy, and even undermines our health. Oh boy, now we can worry about worrying. 

“Oh you of little faith!” says Jesus.   It would be easy to hear that as blaming the victim.  Let’s not go there.  Instead let’s hear Jesus inviting and challenging us to live with less worry.  Worry is not normal or inevitable.  We can replace worry with trust, at least some of it.  In Greek, ‘trust’ is the same word as ‘faith’ and ‘belief’: pistos.  In English, ‘trust’ is a little less loaded with religious baggage than ‘faith’ and ‘belief’.  Trust in God is very helpful.  Trust that the universe is basically friendly.  But we also need to trust each other, and to trust ourselves.

We can replace worry with trust.  And it doesn’t happen by wishing it so.  We have to cultivate trust.  We cancultivate trust; we can practice and get better at it.  If that sounds easy to you, yay for you!  You don’t have much cultivating to do.  If cultivating trust sounds hard, or even impossible, then it will really be valuable for you to do. 

I don’t usually worry about preparing sermons.  I worry about other things.  Week after week I trust that if I show up and put in the work, God will give me something useful to say to you.  Somehow I have learned to trust that it is not my job to get inspired; it is my job to show up and put in the work and leave the results to God.  Experience has shown that usually works.  Experience has also shown that all my worrying accomplishes is to ruin my Saturdays.

So I don’t usually worry about sermons but I worried about this one.  The irony!  I didn’t want to be glib about a reality that causes so much suffering.  I didn’t want to just tell you some platitudes and quick fixes.  So I got to experience some worry first hand, for the purposes of sermon illustration no doubt.  

I don’t like to admit I’m worrying.  I like to call it thinking things over.  And over, and over, and over, like a hamster on a wheel.  When I’m thinking things over at 3 in the morning, I finally have to admit it’s fear or resentment.  Worry is a nice name for fear or resentment.  So when I am awake at 3 in the morning, I get up and pray and journal.  Or this week, write a sermon.  And then my worry usually eases, because instead of spinning that hamster wheel in my head, my worry is on the page in front of me.  I can put it in perspective.  I can be honest with myself about my fears or resentments.  I can remember what’s my job and what’s God’s job.  Sometimes that’s enough right there, to let go of what’s not mine to fix or control, and let God do the heavy lifting.  Even if my worry persists, it’s no longer in the driver’s seat, and I can usually get back to sleep.  

Once I took an anti-anxiety medication for a few weeks.  I took it as a sleep aid, but when I woke up the first morning, I wasn’t thinking anything over (and over and over.)  What a surprise!  I hadn’t even realized I had been waking up every morning worrying till I stopped. 

Worry is like weeds.  I’ve been learning about weeds lately; let me tell you how that happened.  My next-door neighbor Tomaz was the reason I had the courage to try planting a native garden.  He planted one first, and he knew how.  Then Tomaz moved.  My new neighbor Seema is keeping the native plants in her garden.  But she has joint issues that prevent her from weeding.  I glibly said I’d weed her front yard.  I had no idea what I was in for.  Why does it grow so many more weeds than my garden, when it is right next door?  It’s a mystery.  Part of the problem is that I don’t weed it as carefully or as often as my own garden. Give those weeds a head start, and they’ll outrun you.  Part of the problem is she’s got too much bare dirt, just waiting for weeds to sprout. Seema hires a gardener to come weed every month or two.  It’s not his garden either.  He doesn’t get all the weeds.  But he did pull up most of the California Poppies last time he came.  

We don’t cultivate weeds on purpose.  You don’t invite weeds into your garden.  They just come.  The seeds blow in on the wind of the nightly news and a culture that teaches us to fear and resent.  The more you put up with those weeds of worry, the more they take over.  The more you try to ignore them, work around them them, the bigger they get.  

Trust is the open soil that allows new things to grow in us.  Worry, like weeds, crowds out the possibility of new things.  Where do your weeds come from?  Were the seeds planted in childhood? Worry can be a mental health issue. Worry is also a spiritual issue, because how we understand the world and the sacred makes a big difference in how we deal with those weeds. Cultivating the garden of our mind, our soul, is a sacred task and privilege to which God invites us.  

Cultivating is usually slow and careful work.  It requires persistent attention, and repetition.  Despite frustrations, despite a modest result, cultivating trust is worth doing.  Last week I showed you a hula-hoe, a great tool for weeding our native garden.  What tools can we use to weed out worry and cultivate trust?

How handy that Joe Conti is here today to give us a taste of the first, time-honored, tool: guiding our minds through a process of meditation or contemplation.  Much of the time our minds are like unruly toddlers, running in any and every direction.  We can gently invite our attention to a focus: our breath, or a mantra, or a specific image or bible verse and invite that toddler that is our unruly mind to sit still just for a few moments.  And with practice, we can do it persistently.  Imagine that, instead of persistent worry, persistent focus on something helpful!  There are of course many other reasons to meditate.  Time and again people have discovered that when they quiet the chatter of their own minds, in that stillness they encounter a Presence that is trustworthy, a Presence that brings healing and peace.

A second tool: shift our thinking with a few choice words: bible verses or slogans or words from your favorite song or prayer.   We can memorize them, chant them, keep a list to remind us.  Through the bible are scattered little jewels that invite us to trust God.  Twelve-step groups have great one-liners.  The Psalms are full of good ones.  Keep a lookout for your personal favorites.  If saying it makes you take a deep breath and feel a little peace, you know you’ve found a keeper.  Here are some of my personal favorites.

            The “I am” statements from John’s gospel:  I am the bread of life.  I am the light of the world.  I am the true vine.

            A bible verse: Nothing in all creation can separate us from the love of God. 

                        (Romans 8:38-39, the short)

            Slogans like : God loves me just as I am, flaws and all.

            I have a savior and I’m not it.

            Let go and let God.  

            A question: 

                        What is my business, what is your business, and what is God’s business?

            A metaphor:  An unhelpful thought is a car driving by.  I don’t have to open that car door and go for a ride. 

            A song: Spirit of the living God, fall afresh on me…

            And this one is not mine but I enjoy it:  Not my circus, not my monkeys.

I wonder what are your favorites?

A third tool to cultivate trust: pray.  Tell your worries to God.  At length, if you like.  Writing them down works very well.  You have my permission to rant and rave and curse… And then listen.  Ask God what to let go, and how to do it.  And then listen.  Seek God in nature.  And then listen.  Do you detect a theme here?  Listen! Part of worry is getting caught up in our mind’s chatter and not listening. Just the act of listening can interrupt worry.  We’ll talk about more ways to pray next week.

A fourth tool to cultivate trust: talk to other people, people who care about you and believe in you and can help you get perspective.  That could mean a therapist, because when your weeds are looking like trees, you need a professional.  Did you know that everyone in Orange County can get therapy for free?  Good therapy, according to a friend who’s tried it. Our tax dollars at work; try it and tell me if I’m wrong.  The contact information is on our kiosk.  You can also talk to a friend who cares about you and lifts you up.  You could even talk to your pastor.  It’s my job, and I love it.  And you can be this fourth tool for other people.  You can be a good listener.  You can show empathy.  You can share a possibly helpful perspective.  You can look them in the eye and say,  “I believe in you.”  A funny thing happens when I do that for other people.  I stop worrying for a while.

There are more tools if you look for them.  Sensory and body tools.  Cultivating trust is work, and it’s worth the work.  A final tool is in our bible passage: strive for the Kingdom of God, and the rest will follow.  We sing it, right?  Seek ye first the kingdom of God, and God’s righteousness.  And all these things will be given to you.  In other words, have purpose in our lives beyond our personal security and happiness. If worries are like weeds, choking out the good things, a vital purpose is like a mulch or groundcover: it keeps the weeds from taking hold.  Our purpose as Christians?  We get to be on God’s team, with the job of enjoying God’s word, and spreading a little hope and comfort and love, and not judging… hmm, if we stopped judging what we shouldbe doing, what shouldhappen… would it even be possible to worry?  

So we begin… to cultivate trust.  And the weeds of worry will keep sprouting from old seeds.  So Jesus helps us cultivate trust.  He gathers us up in his arms like little children, and says, “I’ve got this, honey.  You’re safe.” And he invites us, like teens, to get out of ourselves and into the world:  “I’ve got good things for you to learn.   Come join the family business of making the world a better place.”  And Jesus comforts us, like weary middle-aged people, “What you’re doing is not in vain.  I am with you and in you and you aredo bearing fruit for my kingdom.”  And he reassures us to the end of our lives, “Whatever happens, I am with you.  Forever.” Thank you, God, for being trustworthy, for believing in us, for cultivating our trust.  Amen.